Much to be Thankful for

These past two days have certainly been crazy.

Less than 48 hours ago, I heard on the news about the terrorist attacks in Mumbai. I have 2 friends from high school currently living and working there, one of which I'm very close with. At the time, I thought the attacks happened around 1 am there and thus assumed my friend was probably asleep and out of harm's way. She lives with family and has a driver, so I knew she wouldn't be at the train station. I thought there might be an off chance she was at one of the hotel's bars, but since it was a work-night, I assumed she was home. Still, I posted on her facebook wall to make sure she was okay.

Not yet understanding the scope of the attacks, I had a pleasant evening Wednesday. I got off early from work, stopped by Saks, and then met up with Mr. to see the balloons being blown up for the parade. We ate at the Uno's on the upper west side, where we were treated a little like VIPs which boggled us both.

When we came home, Mr. turned on the news and there was non-stop coverage of the Mumbai attacks. I heard that they were singling out Americans and British, which is when I remembered my other friend living there. The friend I'm closer with, while American, is racially Indian and thus wouldn't stand out as an American. Our other friend, however, is a tall white woman with light-brunette hair. So, I posted on my friend's wall again to check in on our other friend.

I was very relieved to wake up to an email early Thanksgiving morning notifying me of a facebook wall post made by my friend assuring me that she and our other friend were both safe. I went back to sleep for a couple more hours before waking up to prepare for Thanksgiving.

I spent the morning watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, cleaning up, and setting the table. I even folded napkins, just for fun. All the while, I spoke to my cousin online, bummed that we couldn't be together for the holiday that used to be the guaranteed time of year we'd get to hang out and catch up.

I then began to prepare our feast and was almost done, when I received a text message from my friend letting me know that her uncle was one of the hostages. I told her I'd be praying for him and her family, feeling helpless that I couldn't do more.

I told Mr. what was going on but continued to finish Thanksgiving dinner. My brother arrived right on time, and the three of us enjoyed the food. I have to say it turned out quite well, with full bellies all around. We then set up the Christmas tree and watched some Curb Your Enthusiasm episodes on HBO onDemand.

When my brother left, I wrote an email of support to my friend, offering my ear if she needed or wanted it. I was relieved to be able to focus on her again after playing hostess.

Shortly thereafter, though, I started to feel miserable all over, discomfort, nausea. I had food poisoning, it seems. Luckily, neither Mr. nor my brother got sick, so I'll still count my first solo Thanksgiving as a success. But, for someone who rarely gets sick, I was miserable. Luckily, Mr. was there to doctor me and to make a CVS run for me. He even cleaned up after me, which is when it's really great to be married to someone in the medical field - they're not easily grossed out.

I sort of napped on the couch for much of the night, when I received a text message from my friend that her uncle had been freed. What a relief!! At that point, with my food poisoning over and my friend's uncle safe, I was truly able to count my blessings.

I ask for continued thoughts and prayers for the recovery of the former hostages as well as for the families of all those affected. The attacks on Wednesday were truly abhorrent and sickening. I wish they had never happened at all.

Is this thing on?

Remember that time I posted here? Wow, it's certainly been a while.

Life has just been crazy busy lately. My job is such that it gets busier when the lawyers have less to do, so needless to say, things have been a little nuts at work. I've even been putting in some overtime, which is always nice to see on my paycheck.

Meanwhile, I just finished with a bunch of tests and papers in school, and I'm confident that I'm going to pass all of my classes. In fact, I think I've figured out what I want to do as a career as well. I'd like to be a planner, which in the fashion industry is the math geek who crunches the numbers and figures out what has sold before and what will probably sell again. We've glossed over planning in my buying class, but I'll take a more planning-focused class in the spring. If I like it, I'll try to sneak into an advanced election for my last semester.

Mr. has re-started his networking in orthopedics, so we're getting to a comfortable place as far as where he needs to be at this point. Right now he's focusing on finishing up his psych clerkship, and then Thanksgiving!

Now I need to figure out how to get to a christening in New Jersey on Sunday. This would be a good time to have a car...

I'll Be Home for Christmas

I guess 'home' could have two main definitions for me - home with Mr. in New York or home where I grew up in the Midwest - and being 'home for Christmas' could refer to the actual day or the days surrounding in celebration of the holiday.

Either way, the statement pretty much stands. Since Mr. gets Christmas Day (and only Christmas Day) off during his next rotation, I'm going to spend Christmas Eve and Day in the city and then fly back to the Midwest on the 26th for 8 days in my hometown (which only requires taking 19 hours of my vacation time. woot.).

While I'm a little bummed I'll miss the Christmas Eve service at my small hometown church (and subsequent mini-reunion with the kids I went to Sunday school with who have also left town), I am very curious and excited about the service at my church in the city. Everything is bigger here, and Easter is fabulous across the city as the one day a year New Yorkers go to church. At a church I attended on Fifth Avenue for a few months on a particularly ritzy corner of Manhattan, families would line up around the blocck for the 11 o'clock service, dressed in their finest, few without a fancy hat.

Though my current church is still in a nicer Manhattan neighborhood, we don't have lines outside to get in on Easter Sunday. Most of our members visit family during that time. So I'm curious to see the balance on Chirstmas - will most people be out in the 'burbs celebrating with non-city family? Or will there be droves of C&E Christians popping in on one of the two days a year they go to church?

Regardless, this city is also magnificant at Christmastime. Shopping is a nightmare, of course, but everything is so pretty. There are decorations in every nook and cranny you can find. Filled with holiday spirit and those holiday bonuses, New Yorkers are even more generous than usual. It's a splendid time of year.

Enough about Christmas in NYC, though, and back to the real point of this post. Holiday plans tend to be tricky in most families. It's a time for extended families to gather, but families extend in multiple directions. Who do you see and where and when? In fact, I think there's a movie coming out this winter with Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn based in part on this concept.

Last year, when Mr. was an MS2, we went to his parents' for Thanksgiving and mine for Christmas. We were going to switch this year, but the schedule doesn't allow for it. He has a week off the first week of December, but I still have class, and he'll probably use that time to shadow surgeons/network/breathe.

Luckily both sets of parents are awesome and always totally willing to work with our schedules. So when I ask my parents if I can come the day after Christmas, they're totally fine with it and will pick me up from the airport!

Now I'm just hoping my friends from high school (none of whom live in our hometown anymore, but all of whom will drive back for the holidays) will be around after Christmas this year. Last year they were all around prior to Christmas and left Christmas Day or the day after, but I'm hoping since it's on a Thursday this year instead of a Tuesday, they'll be around for the weekend.

It should be interesting to see how holidays are moving forward. I imagine Mr. will usually be working. Pre-kids I'll probably enjoy this as it means I get to go to my parents (not that I don't love the in-laws, but they're not my parents) every Christmas. Once we have kids, though, I'm not sure how we'll adjust. I imagine we'll be hosting. Since I love hosting and only have one sibling who doesn't love hosting, I think it will work out pretty well. That's a long trip down the road, though.

Burnout Avoided

No, not Mr.'s. Mine.

10 Days ago, I stayed in Manhattan following NYU's annual Greek Night. The following night I went out to dinner with my family line. The next morning I woke up early along with Mr. to volunteer for New York Cares Day, and the following morning up early to walk in Making Strides Against Breast Cancer. The next two nights I had midterm exams.

Sounds like a recipe for burnout, but luckily Mr. was there to pick up the slack. He went grocery shopping, cleaned the entire apartment, and did the laundry. I think he might have done the dishes once. I'd ask if that's what being in a non-medical marriage is like, but I imagine even in those that level of helpfulness tends to be a special occurrence.

I spent much of the rest of this week playing catch-up, but since Mr. is on his psych rotation at the moment, he's still been able to help out here and there (I got my grocery buddy back today!).

I'll have to enjoy it now, though. It looks like Mr.'s going to go with orthopedic surgery after all. le sigh*.

*I'm just being dramatic. I'm warming up to the idea of him going into orthopedics.

My Latest Project

Hopefully STM will jump on here to explain her latest project, but for now I'll tell you what I'm working on.

Since Mr. is now thinking he wants to specialize in Ophthalmology, I have been charged with finding out what in the world this early match stuff means and what he needs completed by when.

First, I went to SF Match, where I learned:

• You register online no earlier than June and pay $100
• You're applying to start PGY-2
• You also need to go through the regular match for a transitional year
• Each individual program has its own due dates for the application sometime between June and December
• Your match list is due in the beginning of January (for the class of 2009 it's January 8, 2009)
• You learn your match results in January, before you submit your match list for your transitional year.

Awesome. So next I wanted to find out where the top ophthalmology residencies are. Unlike college or even medical school, figuring out residency rankings seems to be a little tricky. So far I've looked at NIH to see which residency programs received the most awards, and then I looked at the top hospitals for ophtho in US News & World Report. The first is flawed because it's three years old and purely based on monetary awards. The second is flawed because its referring to hospitals, not residency programs and thus doesn't focus on teaching, research, etc. (not to mention most residents rotate through a handful of hospitals within a single program). If anyone has other listings, let me know!

Anyway, using those two lists, I created a spreadsheet with 35 ophthalmology residency programs and am going through right now listing the city, state, region, NIH ranking, US News ranking, US News reputation score, CAS deadline, interview time frame, number of positions available each year, contact information, and the website.

I'll ask Mr. if he wants me to add anything. Suggestions welcome!

Might we have a winner?

Opthomology! erm, Opthamology! grrr.... Ophthalmology!!

Mr. attended a 'speed dating' event this morning to help determine what he wanted to specialize in and to network with doctors in that specialty. There actually wasn't an Orthopedics table nor an Otolaryngology table, but the ophthalmologist he met did assure him that there is more than meets the eye when it comes to doctoring the... eye. And in doing so, he helped sway Mr. toward that profession.

Not only is there more going on with the eye than say, the hand (Mr. had recently mentioned specializing in hand surgery...), but there are also symptoms for larger problems that show up in the eye. So, as an ophthalmologist, Mr. would be able to still diagnose larger problems including diabetes and a bunch of other diseases and conditions I had never heard of before/can't remember now.

Of course, ophthalmology has an early match program, so now we're running around trying to find out how it works. It looks like there will still be time to do an away or at least an elective in optho before making any definite decisions. He'll also (hopefully) shadow during his next break and take a week to specialize in optho during his surgery clerkship.

I hope this sticks. When he was telling me about it, he really did finally seem to care about the work/life balance aspect of it. "I've been working hard a long time" (he started working at 16 and didn't stop until coming to medical school, where he's also done research outside of class and worked as a PA in anatomy). "I think I'd like a career where I can spend time with my family."

Hallelujah!

Now, if he changes his mind, yet again, and decides that ortho really is what he wants to do, I will still support him. But I'm still excited about ophthalmology for now. :)

Nights!

Mr. just finished a week of nights. Well, really it ended up just being Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday night, but considering he worked 14-15 hour shifts, plus a day shift on Monday and lectures Tuesday day, he certainly had a full week delivering babies and learning ob/gyn.

He worked something like 6pm-8/9am. On days when I don't have class, I leave for work at 8:05am and get home at 6:30pm. That's actually not bad considering my old commute and work hours had me out of the house for a bare minimum of 12 hours/day (7am-7pm, usually closer to 6:50am-7:30pm). BUT, of course that means Mr. and I haven't been home at the same time since I left for work on Tuesday morning. And tonight I'm catching up with a friend who's in town from Hong Kong for the weekend, and then I'm crashing in Manhattan.

I'll see Mr. eventually. :)

Billy Elliot

Last Friday (holy crap, why am I only just now getting to writing this??), I saw the best thing on Broadway right now (with the possible exception of South Pacific). I say that with confidence even though I haven't seen everything on Broadway.

Last Friday was the annual support staff outing for the law firm. All of the partners' were out of town for their annual meeting, which meant we could go party while the associates fended for themselves! (Okay, so there were 5 staffers on, just in case). The partners generously treat all of us non-attorneys to dinner, drinks and arcade games at Dave & Busters in Times Square followed by a Broadway show. Each year there are 5 choices for shows, which we rank in order of our preferences, and preferences are recognized in order of who responds first.

Since the support staff outing was within 2 weeks of Mr.'s next shelf exam and coming along would mean violating his 2 week rule, I made plans to bring my work friend who recently left the firm to have an actual career instead. As soon as the list came out, she and I figured out our preferences. Most of my coworkers were remarking that they hoped they liked the show they were seeing. I was confident Billy Elliot would be phenomenal, and it didn't disappoint.

The opening number, admittedly, is a little weak vocally, and this is not a show you see for the brilliant singing. However, the music is catchy and enjoyable. It's hard to go wrong with Elton John (well, except he does take the melody from the bridge in 'I Dreamed a Dream' from Les Miserables and put it into 'The Letter' in this show. Oh well, it's a good melody).

The story, as those of you who saw the movie (I did not) already know, is heartwarming and perfect for the stage, despite being a little predictable. I won't go on about the plot because I'm assuming everyone knows the premise.

So yes, this production has triple-cast the physically challenging title role with three brilliant young men. I had the privilege of seeing Kiril Kulish perform the role. I was completely captivated. He totally blew me away with his dancing talent. He was performing choreography that would be impressive for an adult professional dancer. And he's barely 14. When I got home that night, I looked him up on youtube to watch his past competitions because I couldn't believe it. I also discovered a video of him playing a difficult Chopin Fantasie on the piano and became angry at myself for not being more dedicated to dance and piano when I was his age.

I realize I'm totally rambling, but go see it. Soon you will not be able to get tickets because I have a feeling it will sell out very quickly. Go. Seriously, go now. If you have any appreciation for dance whatsoever, you have to see this show.

By George, she's got it!*

So Mr. wasn't as thrilled with otolaryngology as I was. Basically, I think my 'Eureka!' moment should have come a year earlier when he had time to get excited about it, shadow doctors, scrub in on surgeries, etc. BUT, he is considering it. In fact, I think it's basically down to 2. Two high-paying, uber competitive surgical specialties that begin with the letter 'O' (in order of likelihood):

1. Orthopedics
2. Otolaryngology (yes, I really like that word)

When we both took a look at the little data that we could find, I've learned that when comparing the two, the pay for otolaryngology isn't quite as high and the hours (after residency) aren't that much better. That said, I'm still pulling for ENT over Ortho. I can't really explain why. Maybe it's because the only medical problems I've ever had have been in in my head and neck? Or because I'm a singer and thus have a fascination with the vocal cords? Or perhaps because I've read about ortho being bad enough times that I have this notion that it's very very very bad and anyone who chooses it hates sunshine and happiness. Or maybe it's a combination of those things. Who knows. I just have to keep repeating the mantra I wrote yesterday: it's important to find the right speciality for him, because if he's miserable in his job, he'll be miserable at home, and I won't want to see him those extra hours throughout the week anyway!

Regardless of which he chooses, though, my pseudo-obsession with the idea of otolaryngology finally made the whole location part of residency search 'click' with me. After my blog post, I went to go find the various match statistics and research the different residencies. This past year, there were 273 otolaryngology spots to be filled. By comparison, Ortho, also very competitive, has 636 spots. A lot of programs only have 2 ENT spots to fill. Yikes! Mr.'s a competitive candidate, but that doesn't leave a lot of wiggle room. I started thinking, 'okay, we have to apply to every single program in the midwest and NYC as well as Baltimore, Tennessee, and certain programs in the South. Maybe we should throw Connecticut and Boston into the mix, too. And well, since Pennsylvania is between NYC and the midwest, we might as well look there as well. Oh, what the hell - lets just apply to all of them and see where he gets interviews.' Oh. yeah. That's how it works. Maybe people going into peds or medicine have some options with regards to region, but with the competitive specialties, you just have to go where you can.
I don't know why it took me so long to get that. I think I had just been reading too many message board posts saying 'I have a family so I'm only looking in x area' that made me angry Mr. didn't have the same mentality. But at the end of the day, you just have to go where you match. And in our case (competitive as we are), not matching is not an option.

That said, I still hope he ranks certain midwestern locations rather high... :)


*Bonus points for correctly naming that musical
**Double bonus points for naming the song in said musical
Googling is cheating. ;)

Calendar Communications

If there's one thing I've learned over these past 2 1/2 years as a blogger and a wife, it's how important staying organized is for maintaining peace in a relationship. It's hard enough staying organized myself, but throw my husband's endlessly-changing schedule into the mix it can easily turn into chaos. Add that to my obsession with knowing where everything and everyone is at all times, and you can start seeing why I'm slightly obsessed with keeping myself, my husband, and everyone around me on a tight schedule. Up until now, the hubby and I'd basically been using a system of emailing schedules to each other and then keeping them in our inboxes for a handy reference. But what if his shift changes? We would basically be screwed.
Which is why I was so excited when MW mentioned Google Calendars on here the other day. Syncing calendars was something the hubby and I hadn't thought of before. So guess what? We tried it (got all set up, etc.) on Sunday before the start of his week-long night shift and so far so good. If he's wondering which nights I'm home and which I'm with friends, it's on the calendar. If (or more likely, when) I forget what time he gets off in the morning, it's on the calendar. Genius.

When I grow up...

After a long wonderful day of various events, I got home to Mr. who, at 10:00pm, hadn't eaten dinner yet. I made him some spaghetti, and an hour or so later, technically my 'bed time', he decided that he was going to choose his specialty before going to sleep.

He started out with a list of 6:

1. Orthopedics
2. Gynecologic Oncology
3. Ophthalmology
4. Interventional Radiology
5. Otolaryngology
6. Anesthesiology

Naturally I was excited to hear 3 of the 4 ROAD specialities (if IR still counts for Radiology, that is), but I think my enthusiasm for those three delayed our bedtime unnecessarily.

This was our pro/con list (disclaimer: our pros and cons may not be the same as yours):

Orthopedics:
Pros: High pay, Lots of procedures, deals with various anatomy, challenging, has helped with research in the field, changes lives (going from not walking to walking makes patients happy)
Cons: Notoriously poor work/life balance

Gynecologic Oncology:
Pros: Interesting Procedures, knows that he finds it interesting based on his rotations
Cons: Moderate pay, would have to do OB/Gyn residency first (no guarantee he'd match in gyn onc and he doesn't want to be an OB)

Ophthalmology:
Pros: High pay, great work/life balance, cool procedures
Cons: Focused on only one tiny part of the body, early match (so he'd apply before doing a rotation in it)

Interventional Radiology:
Pros: High pay, cool procedures, possibly good work/life balance?
Cons: Would have to do a regular radiology residency first (no guarantee he'd match in the fellowship, and he doesn't want to read x-rays the rest of his life), no experience in it

Otolaryngology (ENT):
Pros: High pay, cool procedures, deals with various organ systems
Cons: No experience in it yet

Anesthesiology:
Pros: High pay, good work/life balance, requires a lot of knowledge
Cons: No procedures - would have to sit by and watch surgeons do 'the fun stuff'

Not all pros and cons are created equal, so now the list, in no particular order, is:

1. Orthopedics
2. Gynecologic Oncology
3. Ophthalmology
4. Otolaryngology

I know you're thinking 'Oh no! She lost 2 of the 3 ROAD specialties, and the 3rd is hanging on by a thread!' However, it's important to find the right speciality for him, because if he's miserable in his job, he'll be miserable at home, and I won't want to see him those extra hours throughout the week anyway!

I also am thinking that otolaryngology might be a good fit for him (and us) after doing a little more research today... the pay is really good (don't judge - we have crazy mad loans to pay off!), and it has a decent work/life balance. Plus, there are a lot of different surgeries and procedures he could do. Sure, there would be a lot of tonsillectomies, but every specialty is going to have its 1 or 2 extremely common and relatively unexciting procedures. With Otolaryngology, though, there is a wide range of less common and rather exciting procedures, too!

Now I just need to find where the good ENT residency programs are...

24-hour call

Mr. and I have google calendars that we both have access to so we can each know what the other is doing. For Saturday (today), I saw Mr. had marked '12 hour weekend call'. So, I figured Friday night would be a chill night. I'd make some dinner, do a little laundry, and hang out with Mr. during his study breaks. On my way home, though, I received a text message from him informing me that he had 24-hour call and wouldn't be home until 6am.

So, I went home, made dinner, put the rest of it away, did the laundry, washed the dishes, and took out the trash. And while I did that, I though back to the housework shift from single life to married life. It's not that husbands are so high maintenance that they require so much housework, particularly not in my case. Instead (in my completely unsubstantiated opinion), it's because we're more motivated to take care of others better than we take care of ourselves. For example, it's more fun to cook for someone else than just yourself. When I'm just cooking for me, I want the food to be done as soon as possible so I can eat it. When I'm cooking for other people, though, I want them to enjoy it, I want it to be balanced, etc.

By getting into the habit of caring for another person, I feel like perhaps I'm growing up a little bit. There's a reason, after all, why immature characters in movies and tv shows are always eating ramen noodles and Chinese take-out.

Making Time

Yesterday when I was out to lunch with a coworker, I told her about how it feels like Mr. and I are more like roommates at the moment. We talked about the issue and tried to best figure out what exactly I was feeling. Toward the end it just became about time. "We just have to find time," I remarked. She corrected, "no, you have to make time, because you're never going to find it."

I was then reminded of a passage I had selected for our wedding by C.S. Lewis.
...Love in this second sense -- love as distinct from 'being in love' -- is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit...
(The emphasis is mine).

It's hard for two independent and goal minded individuals to start new habits, particularly when there are so many distractions like work and school, especially medical school. Medical students barely have time for themselves, let alone for others, and I imagine it only gets worse as the training progresses. That's why making time is necessary, whether it means Mr. hangs out with me, talking or playing cards during his study breaks or I stay up an extra 15 minutes to pay attention to him.

It will be difficult to start making time. We both have a lot of stuff on our plates - a lot of stuff that is important to us. But I'm confident that if we put the effort in now, it will eventually become habit and stop being difficult.

Roommates

Thursday night, I was an hour or so getting late after finishing some things up at work. By the time I got home, he was in the classroom building studying. By the time he got home, I was in bed.

Friday night, I got home a little after midnight after attending an event at my old sorority house. Mr. was helping our friend bottle beer. I was exhausted and was again asleep before he got home.

Saturday was a long day for me. I did a little homework in the morning while Mr. slept, and then headed into town to grab a quick bite with a friend before heading to see our mutual friend in About Face, a delightful musical comedy that had me laughing out loud throughout. Even the scene changes were adorable. I hope it gets picked up for Broadway. I think it would do quite well there as it certainly has oodles of mainstream appeal. If you're in the city, you should try to catch it Wednesday night!
After the show and a quick bite, I headed up to church for a social event I spearheaded. The regulars of the group were very pleased, and I hope the newcomers weren't intimidated by the small numbers.
Anyway, Mr. was actually home by the time I got home! But, he was studying and 'in the groove' with his noise-canceling headphones on, so we said a few words to each other before I hit the sack.

Sunday morning, Mr. was still asleep when I left for church and out studying when I came back. He came home early... because the Yankee's game was on.

Tonight I have class, and tomorrow I have class followed by a cabaret in Manhattan after which I'll crash at my friend's apartment.

Maybe I'll see Mr. on Wednesday. We definitely feel more like roommates at the moment.

Back to the Grind

I usually get to work roughly 20 minutes early, but about once every month or so, there's some sort of train delay that has me rushing to my office in order to swipe in by 7 minutes past the time I'm supposed to arrive (to avoid having my personal time docked).
By some cruel twist of fate, this always seems to happen on the morning of this monthly meeting that my boss hosts. The morning of this meeting, I always need to take care of a number of issues, including compiling all of the handouts and sending out the invitation to remind everyone. The meeting starts 90 minutes after the start of my day. It would be a bit of a race if it weren't for my train delays.
Even though my personal time won't be docked as I swiped in 6 minutes past, I still spent much of the morning running around like a crazy person. No easing into the day today.

Luckily, I was passed along this hilarious video, which I think will be appreciated by anyone who has worked in or with IT (You may have seen the original Norwegian version, but I like this one better.):

Warehouse Galleries

The summer before I moved to New York, I would drive around my Midwestern town listening to a Lisa Loeb tape after a rough break up and dream of spending my evenings listening to singer songwriters in tiny hole-in-the-wall venues.
While I don't do that sort of thing as often as I had once dreamed, I do still enjoy those little hidden warehouse like venues and discovering emerging artists.

Last Friday, STM and I attended the menswear show for Kesh, a young British designer, held at Anonymous Gallery on the Lower East Side. The actual show started roughly 75 minutes after the scheduled time, and the other audience members were robed in all sorts of eccentric attire. Perhaps that was intentional, as Kesh's quirky men's line seemed tame in comparison.

The show, of course, lasted but a few minutes, and we went to dinner afterwards at B Bar. The atmosphere was great, and the food was alright.

Overall, an eventful Friday evening girl's night out.

Blah Days

Ever have those days where your instincts just seem to be a bit off?

Mr. and I, both perfectionists in our own ways, have had those this week. I mislabeled something on my boss's calendar, asked for the wrong case from the librarian, and I think spoke too much in class on Tuesday (my M.O. is to answer as often as possible so he won't call me when I don't know something, but I think I overdid it last class...). Mr., by luck of the draw, had one day to prep for a written and oral presentation when most students have 3 days and are further into that rotation. Okay, so his blah day was more a result of unfortunate circumstances contrasted with my careless slips, but we were able to keep each other company in our misery.

The week is ending, though, and every moment brings new opportunities to make things better. Mr.'s oral presentation (made on fewer than 2 hours of sleep) was well received, and I'm getting back in the groove at work. I'm also very excited for an eventful weekend.

TGIF :)

911

Last night I was in the financial district for a NY Cares Day Team Leader Orientation. As I walked up Wall Street to the train back to the borough, for some reason I did what I rarely do as a New Yorker - I looked up.

When I did, I saw the image on the right and remembered the day.

September 11, 2001, I was in my AP Government Class, which, as a senior AP, was a class where the nerds could hang out and just debate each other silly. The class where, just a week prior, the faux sexist and I discussed how the Taliban was even more extreme than he would prefer.
That particular morning we were discussing vocabulary. It was a slow morning for our well-intentioned young teacher who just couldn't seem to drag answers out of us.
Then his TA, another senior, came back from the office and told us the world trade center was on fire. At first I figured it must have been some office fire that got out of control. I think many of us were just happy to stop talking vocab and turn on the news.
We then learn it was from a plane. Weird, some private pilot flew into the tall skyscrapers. Right?
Then the other plane hit. That's when we realized it was real. The school was put on lock down. Clearly Al-Qaeda wasn't going to attack us in the middle of a cornfield, but this sort of thing brings the crazies out. Everyone who ever dreamed about placing a bomb threat was now doing so, making the already chaotic day even more so.
We stayed in my AP Government class all morning, watching the news as the third plane hit the Pentagon and the fourth went down in Pennsylvania.
We watched as we learned the Taliban was likely responsible. I had known about their horrendous treatment of women, but I hadn't realized they hated us. I was pretty sheltered and unaware at that time.
Lockdown ended in time for our third period class. For me that was choir.
At that time, I had already decided I was going to try to come to New York for college. I was looking as NYU and Marymount Manhattan College, in that order. A good friend of mine in the year below me was interested in those two as well, so we had planned a college visit trip to New York with our mothers for mid-October during fall break. I saw my friend in choir. This city we had been obsessing about as we planned our visit was now under attack.
Fourth period (after lunch) there was a bomb threat, and they evacuated us to the football field.
We returned for roughly 20 minutes of fifth period, I think, and that was the end of the day.

I was glued to the news that evening. I knew it was big. I knew it was awful. But it seemed so far away. It didn't seem real.
A month later, my friend, our mothers and I made our trip, despite the gasps of shock and horror from other adults in the community that our moms weren't just flying but flying to New York with us so soon.
My friend's mom was a teacher, and her students made a sign for us to place at the site expressing their thoughts and prayers. As we walked down there we saw the roads were blocked off to cars. Pedestrian traffic only. There were fliers everywhere with pictures of missing people, posted on lamp posts like advertisements for a concert.
Throughout the visit, everyone was still talking about it. We'd walk down the street and the party behind us would mention so-and-so who lost her uncle or this person who was there. It became real.

I've spent every September 11 since in this city. As the years go on for those who were here, it becomes a more distant memory. Particularly for those who were here and were fortunate to not lose a loved one.
For me, I think it gets more real each year. First I just lived in New York. Then I lived just a 10 minute walk from the site. Now I work in a skyscraper and truly have context for who would have been there that day. 8:46 am. Janitors, security guards, receptionists. Eager young analysts and low-level professionals getting a crack on the day or still working after a long night. The old secretaries who always take the Express Bus in from an outer borough to arrive 30 minutes early every day. The guy selling donuts and newspapers. The mail guys and gals preparing for their first run of the day. Most people who are in sky scrapers at 8:46am are people who work hard, people who are responsible, people who are probably under appreciated.
It's weird to work in these buildings and think, 'What if it had been this one?'

Depending on where Mr. ends up for residency, I will probably be spending the 9th anniversary away from this city. Never fully inside but never fully outside either, I wonder what the shift will be like.

For today, though, my thoughts and prayers are with those whose loved ones were lost, for those who were here and in DC 7 years ago, and for all of us as we continue living.

Lonely Ring

This morning it took me a little while to realize my alarm was going off. Mr. had left an hour ago. As I walked past his 'office' on the way to the bathroom, I noticed his wedding ring sitting on his desk. If he hadn't made a special point last night to tell me he loves me, it probably would have taken me longer to remember he's in labor & delivery this week.

Home Brews and I Do's!

This weekend was mostly spent with med school friends. Saturday Mr. was hanging out with one of his classmates when he called me to go over there for dinner. He also asked me to bring his camera and our 2 cup measuring cup.
When I went over there, I discovered said classmate had recently invested in a home brewing kit and was going to start his first batch after dinner. Mr. helped, and I documented the whole thing with the camera. The process which should have taken 3 hours took roughly 5. The two medical students diligently made sure the proper materials were adequately sanitized and clearly had to pay close attention to the directions. The longest part of the process was waiting for the wert to cool to a temperature low enough to not kill the yeast. It was also the chilliest part as we had the A/C up high. Overall, it was a very cool and fun experience. Mr. got a text the next morning letting him know that the yeast was already hard at work.
The home brew will be ready by October!

Sunday evening, Mr. and I took a long train through Manhattan out to another outer-borough for an engagement party. We've known this couple since before they were a couple. In fact, I remember being confused when I first started to see them break off from the main group to be all cute and couple-like first year. Mr. had clearly neglected to tell me they were an item. Since then, though, they've become a staple couple in the class - two great people heading in the same direction together. He proposed to her on Sunday afternoon, then had a surprise engagement party waiting for her after she accepted. It's all very exciting, and I'm very happy for them. Mazel tov!

A Researcher's Dream

First, apologies for not posting this past week.  I was sick, busy, and caught up in everything going on in the news.  Can't.  Look.  Away.

Anyway, more on that later.  For now, I can't not share this tidbit that everyone probably already knows about already, but I've just discovered it and am way more excited than I should be.  On NYTimes.com, you can find articles from the early parts of the 20th century.  Perhaps even earlier, I don't know.  Many of them cost money, but some are free, such as this one from 1914, with the headline FASHIONS FOR SUMMER FROCKS HARK BACK TO 1870; Styles One May Buy in Paris at Small Prices --More Plaids Than Roman Stripes in Fashion Centre.

This may prove infinitely useful as I work on my research paper about Madame Grés for my online class.  The daughter of a librarian, I've been around microfilm and whatnot my entire life, but I never did master the art of researching the old fashioned way.  Putting everything online, even if they are pdf's, makes life so much easier.  As for how you find these wonderful windows to the past, if you search a word it will give you every article they have with that word, I believe... including articles from 1914. :)

ETA: They have articles as early as 1851, which I believe is their entire collection.  You can narrow down to search for only recent articles, though. 

Adoration

So Mr. is done with his first rotation and finally gets a break.  We didn't make it to the zoo, but we did go out to dinner with STM and her hubby to the Boat Basin.  Good food, great atmosphere.  I'd heard of Boat Basin for a while, so I'm glad they suggested it!

Later last night, as Mr. was packing to go home, we had Nick at Nite on.  As you may know, Nick at Nite currently shows sitcoms from our childhood and adolescence: Home Improvement, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Family Matters, and George Lopez.  Judge us if you will, but this is the time slot he and I can agree on.  

As I nostalgically remembered all the handful of nights one or both of us has stayed up packing with Nick on this past year, I remarked, "I love our mutual [inner monologue: don't say love again] adoration of cheesy 90's television."  "Adorittion?" Mr. repeated, confused.  Thinking I had said it sloppily, I repeated, "a-dor-RAY-shun".  He was still clueless.  "Adoration!  Like, adore, but in noun form!"  He then went on to insist that he had never heard the word before in his life.  Now I know how my parents felt when I thought 'cajole' was such an out-there word to learn during my SAT prep.  Except adoration is still so much more common than cajole.  I think Mr.'s head must be so full of medical stuff, obscure raps, and commercial jingles from the late 1980's that he doesn't have room for regular knowledge.

The Right Choice

When I was in 7th grade, there were two boys named Matt in my class (the advanced class - we were all nerds). One was tall and skinny. He was my 'boyfriend'. The other was shorter, stockier, and wore glasses with transition lenses. This second Matt was a really nice guy. He wasn't particularly anti-social, but many times if there was downtime in class, he wouldn't jump into a bunch of conversations with his friends like everyone else was doing. He'd sit back and observe. I supposed I was also observant then as I noticed this and asked what he was doing.
"Sometimes I just like to sit back and watch people."
At the time it seemed a little creepy, but since I liked just about anything that was outside the norm, I also found it kind of cool. I started to imitate, probably lacking the actual thought process to fully analyze at that point. But then it became a habit, and I became curious by various cliques and social tendencies. In high school, I was curious where exactly my group of friends fit, and in college I was quick to observe the differences between a New Yorker's attitude and the attitudes of those from the Midwest.

Being a huge math nerd, I have an eye for patterns, trends. I'm only one week in, but this skill I've developed is precisely what working in fashion is all about. Taking note, anticipating, etc. It's a big math and numbers game, which will probably give me a slight academic advantage over most of my classmates, drawn to fashion for the artistic side. The one exception would be that girl who used to be an investment banker.
The rest of it is getting inside the mind of the every day consumer. Not insisting on your own taste, but recognizing the mainstream taste or the specific taste for your market. This is the same sort of thing needed in entertainment, but people actually pay attention in fashion.

Yes, this was the right choice for me. This will be good.

Every time I start a new job, a coworker gets pregnant.

Well, 3 for 3 at least.

A little over 2 years ago, I started my first full-time job as a secretary at a law firm.  After training, I was placed almost immediately in a pairing of desks with AS.  We had just hit a groove of a friendship when she revealed to me that she was pregnant.  As she was preparing for maternity leave, a new girl, AR, started at a nearby desk station.  When AS left, I was moved to the desk station with AR and formed a friendship with her.

I then got an opportunity to be a secretary elsewhere for more money.  It sounded promising, so I left shortly after AS returned, and AS moved to the desk station with AR.

My phone coverage at the new job was a woman a year or two my senior, RP.  It took a little longer for us to warm up to each other, but we eventually formed a rapport.  Sure enough, she soon became pregnant.  Meanwhile, I hated my new job and longed for the law firm again.

So, I called my old boss and put plans in motion to start back in a new position there.

My top priorities upon my return (4 months ago) were to see AS and AR, particularly AR as she was leaving for California for the summer for her husband's job.  Now that the summer is over, AR has returned, and when we met to catch up, I was delightfully surprised to find that she was, yep, 4 months pregnant.

You heard it here first, kids.  Trying to conceive?  Get your boss to hire me as your coworker.

Always feels like a race against father time...

...In the streets of New York.

On Monday, I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood instead of going to the gym on my lunch break.  I work in a 'shiny' area of the city, full of high end retail stores.  It's probably my favorite neighborhood of all with the crisp, clean smell that gently wafts from the doors of the high end shops, the artful ads, the smartly dressed business men and women walking in a streamline fashion.  

It's not the preferred neighborhood of most people I know, though.  You see, New York (or Manhattan specifically), is just a bunch of little neighborhoods squished together on one tiny little 34 square mile island.  There are countless names - some of them familiar, like Harlem and Times Square, some of them better known to New Yorkers, such as Murray Hill and Tribeca, and even some yet that many New  Yorker's wouldn't be able to locate on the map like Manhattan Valley or Turtle Bay.  Each has a unique personality developed through the shops, the restaurants, the real estate prices, the inhabitants, and the entertainment, just like any other town.  Except these are not towns - these are neighborhoods of sometimes only a few blocks.  So, despite this being the 'big apple', there's nothing all that terrifying about moving here from a small town.  You just need to find the neighborhood where you belong and make it yours.  The rest of the island's neighborhoods are simply like neighboring towns - great to take advantage of and visit but not necessarily home.

I had started out with a point I had wanted to make, but I like this better.  Let me just finish this off with a statistic, though, that I learned in my buying class last night:

The average 30 year old woman in Westchester County has 3.2 children.

The average 30 year old woman in Manhattan has 0.8 children.

Not surprising, but fascinating nonetheless.

Previewing the Future?

I added a new blog to our blog list on the left, Ricochet Dreamer, written by the wife of a family medicine resident in Texas. I just started reading it a few weeks ago, but so far it has really kept me interested, mainly because it seems like a lot of the things she's going through are the same things we'll be facing in just a few years: New places, new jobs, new routines, and a very tired husband (This post made me laugh.) So anyways, hopefully I'm not the only one who likes the blog, and hopefully she'll keep updating and keep me entertained.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Cupcakes

One of my favorite parts about being grown up is getting invited to dinner parties.  Tonight I was invited by a friend of a friend (who is now a friend herself) to an end of summer all girls dinner party.  When I asked if I could bring anything, she suggested dessert.  Woot.

My first thought was to make these delicious peanut-butter cupcakes that Mr. made once, but then I found out that the hostess is allergic to nuts.  Plus I can't find my cupcake cookbook. :(

Attached to the cupcake idea, though, as they're somewhat easy to transport, I started on the hunt for a simple yet unique recipe with ingredients that could be found at the nearby supermarket.

First I looked at Little Ms Foodie's blog remembering she had this delicious recipe I've been meaning to try for Mascarpone & Strawberry cupcakes, but I wasn't confident I would be able to find mascarpone cheese at the supermarket.  However, she did have a link to How to Eat a Cupcake, where I discovered a link to the recipe I ended up using for Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Cupcakes.

The mere thought of whole milk makes me a little queasy, so I instead used 1 cup of skim milk and 2 teaspoons of melted butter.  I also wasn't able to find frozen cookie dough, so I bought 1 lb of the refrigerated kind, broken into 24 pieces, then froze, as suggested.

I didn't quite feel up to making icing from scratch, so I just bought some store chocolate icing... with sprinkles.

Since the recipe makes twice as many cupcakes as I was taking to the party, I enlisted the help of STM.  We make quite the baking team.  We also make quite the eating team.  After the first batch, we sampled them to make sure they turned out alright.

Yes, that's cookie dough goodness in the middle.  Content with our results, we continued with the rest.

I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say they were a huge hit.  I was the second guest to arrive, so most were unaware that I was the one who brought the cupcakes when they moaned in delight.  Mission accomplished.

Even if the cupcakes hadn't been a hit, though, the dinner party was truly fabulous.  I met a lot of people, including a girl who had gone to undergrad with Mr. - what a small world!  I only knew two people going into the evening, but by the end of the night, I felt like I had known all of them much longer.

And as I headed to the subway, I noticed this text message from Mr.: 

'I hope the dinner party is well.  The cupcakes are good.'

What a lovely night!

The Two-Week Rule

Mr. has a rule that he doesn't leave the borough within 2 weeks of a test. For the boards he rarely even left the classroom building for the month prior.

His first shelf exam is less than a week away, so for this Golden Weekend, he'll be stuck indoors.

Don't get me wrong - I admire how disciplined he is, and his strategy is definitely effective for achieving great things.  However, he's seriously in danger of becoming one of those guys who always talks shop because he has nothing else of interest to say.  Maybe next weekend (after the shelf but before his next rotation) we can do something fun and not medically related.  My vote is the zoo. :)

Student v. Student

Last night before bed, Mr. called me, 'Ms. Student' or something like that in a sweet tone.  It really felt nice because after orientation, I feel that he gets this is real.

I have varied interests, and let's face it, none of them are live saving.  They're life enhancing.  They're also not very profitable, so it can seem a bit silly for me to spend all this money on my undergrad degree and then spend some more money to get a lower level degree from a less academically competitive school.  The confusion is compounded when surrounded by future doctors, of both philosophy and medicine.  Why would you not seek to get the highest degree you possibly can??  This confusion has caused a slight disconnect between Mr. and me once or twice since I got my acceptance letter.  Here's the breakdown:

1. They don't offer Fashion Merchandising at the graduate level.
2. Even if they did, I don't have the appropriate background to pursue it.
3. Associate's degrees are cheaper than master's degrees.
4. For what I think I want to do in fashion, a master's would be overkill.
5. If I get to the point where a master's would help my career, my employer can pay for it!

Pursuing a career in medicine, with all the competition, is pretty straightforward: You go to college, pre-med, take the MCATs, apply to medical school, attend medical school, apply for residencies, make a match list, [hopefully] match, and the process continues.  Other careers, particularly those in artistic fields such as theatre and fashion, are less linear.  Those wacky right-brain industries!  Instead it's all about connections and having something to offer besides that.  For some it's talent, others it's experience, and for me it'll probably be my studies.

I think in addition to the confusion, though, Mr. was just worried about the time factor.  He's in school, and his schedule is intense.  I'll be in school and working full time, not to mention my commute.  How will anything get done?  It won't be easy, but we'll make it work.  Plus, with neither of us home, the apartment can't get that messy, right?  I figure now is the time to do this, before throwing pets or children into the mix.  And ultimately I'll have to be doing something to rake in the dough while Mr.'s a resident and putting his entire salary toward student loans.  BigLaw doesn't exist in the boonies, after all, and who knows where we'll be for residency.

We don't read and write poetry because it's cute.  We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race.  And the human race is filled with passion.  And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life.  But poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for.

~Dead Poets Society

Oriented

Today I left work early in order to attend my orientation for fashion school. Since the bookstore is only open until 6:00pm or early on weekdays and closed on weekends, today was the only day for me to pick up my books. So, I rushed out of work, caught the train, and coolly and calmly walked up to my school for the first time. The thing about fashion school is that everyone thinks they know about clothes and fashion and most of them do. My style is much more classic than that of those I passed. It's also more, ahem, work appropriate. After picking up my books, I passed a girl who looked like she stepped out of a Madonna music video circa Holiday complete with a mini jean skirt, teased hair, and many thin bangle bracelets.

Suddenly feeling old/out of place/from the wrong decade, I tried to find the seminar rooms. Luckily it only required talking to 2 different security guys. The orientation sessions were broken down based on program, which means I was with other night and weekend fashion merchandising management majors who already have a bachelor's degree. Those 10 other women and one dude seemed much more like me than some of the students I had passed on the street. More conservatively dressed, varied interests, born prior to 1990... One even has a kid! Hopefully I'll have classes with a few of them.

Then of course, one of the professors at my orientation advised that we don't buy our books prior to our first class, but half the books I purchased were listed on the syllabus for one class, and well, the other 2 look interesting at least!

Added bonus - I got my id card after orientation, and there was no line! Sweet.

The Alarm Clock Tango

There are two types of people in this world: those who snooze and those who don't. Mr's the former. I'm the latter.
I set my phone's alarm for 7:00am every weekday, and 8:00am on Sundays. The alarm rings, I shut it off ASAP, and I head to the bathroom to start my routine. On days I didn't get enough sleep, I'll ease into the day by checking my email first before heading to the bathroom. For me this is the start of a leisurely morning. I'm physically ready by 7:30, dressed, hair done, make-up applied. That gives me 35 minutes to check my email some more, look on facebook, watch the CBS Early show, make my lunch, make the bed, and do the dishes. By the time I leave at 8:05, I'm a fully functioning and awake person.
Mr., on the other hand, has a complex system involving his phone alarm and an actual alarm clock that I bought freshman year of college. At 6:30, his phone alarm goes off. At 6:40, the actual alarm. He continues to snooze and reset until he finally rolls out of bed, which has lately been after I've finished brushing my teeth. This means that I actually wake up at 6:30 and just sort of lie there until my alarm goes off.
The awkwardness of the half-hour between his first alarm and my alarm is compounded by the face that he sleeps on the side of the bed adjacent to the wall, requiring him to either crawl over me or exit at the foot of the bed in order to hit his snooze button. It's an interesting dance we do each morning.
I wonder how the routine will change when he starts OB. Only 2 more weeks of Medicine. *whew*

This morning after the alarm clock tango, I was commuting to work, as I do every morning, and at the 2nd to last stop in the Borough, the pre-recorded announcement told us: "This is the last stop on this train; everybody please leave the train. Thank you, and have a safe day." Some passengers got off. Many of us stayed on waiting to see if there would be an actual announcement by a live person. It's not totally unheard of for the operators to press the wrong announcement button in there. 30 seconds to a minute later, the same pre-recorded message was played. At that point, most of the remaining passengers deboarded...until we heard the voice say, 'Stand clear of the closing doors, please', at which point we rushed back on the train. A number of passengers remained on the platform, which meant those of us who had boarded now all had seats. Sweet. The train continued into Manhattan. Suckers!

Friday Night in the City

My friend from work turned in her timecard yesterday.  It's time to start her 'real job'.  While I'm sad to lose a lunch buddy, it's always reassuring to see people make it out.  That doesn't mean I hate my job.  No, quite the contrary.  I really enjoy working at the law firm...I just don't want to work there forever.  The danger of working a job that you love is that you'll do it forever and never move on to a career.  I have too much pride for that.  I love the law firm and all they've done for me, but I want to do something that I've chosen, not something that just happened to fall in my lap.

Anyway, since it was her last day, she was invited to happy hour by one of the attorneys.  Not wanting to go alone, she invited me to come with her.  I felt a little awkward wearing my rain boots, but it was happy hour, not a club, and besides I'm married, so what does it matter?  My friend also kept insisting that the boots were super cute.

We stopped off at her apartment first and ordered in Pizza 33.  Best. Pizza. Ever.  No joke.  I've been to Grimaldi's, Lombardi's, and Patsy's, and while they are all phenomenal with incredible ingredients and toppings, Pizza 33 also has delicious crust.  Seriously, go there.  Like, yesterday.

After the best pizza ever, we headed out in the sprinkling rain - you know the type that is hard enough to be annoying but not hard enough to be the jerk with umbrella? - to happy hour at Borough.  I was relieved to find a casual, chill atmosphere, and while I still felt silly wearing my rain boots, I didn't feel terribly underdressed.  I had much more fun than I expected to have.  We played some pool.  I hit about 3 balls in on purpose, all in the last game.  Unfortunately, I also scratched about 6 times.  I get the mathematics of pool, but I totally suck at the mechanics.  I ended up staying an hour later than I expected and realized I miss going out.  Not clubbing, because, in my opinion, it's not worth it in New York (too crowded and expensive), but just hanging out, playing pool, doing stuff you can't really do in our neighborhood in the Borough.  My friend, I think, felt the same way.  And since she's a granny like me who likes to go to bed at a reasonable hour, I think she'll make a good going out buddy in the future.  And I'm totally down with being her wing-woman.

Back to School!

Okay, confession time - I'm a nerd. Like, a huge nerd. When I was in kindergarten, I was jealous of my brother in 2nd grade because he got homework. I wanted homework! Before 6th grade, I remember using the map of the school to plan my route during passing period. To be fair, my middle school was 3 stories high and our passing periods were 4 minutes long. However, I also did the same before my freshman year in high school...and did what I could before freshman year in undergrad as well.

I will be starting school in 10 days, and while I don't have to worry about passing periods as I only have once class per night, I have planned for just about everything else. I've even poked around the site I'll use for my online course. I'm confident I'll be able to find the classrooms for my regular class as the buildings are identified by letters (A, B, C, and D). However, I was worried about where to go for my orientation, which is next Tuesday. I've known the date and time for weeks now but not the location. You can imagine how awkward and nervous I was getting until yesterday when I received a letter in the mail with all of the room locations for all of the program orientations. Most seemed to be in classrooms, a few in the amphitheatre, one in the faculty dining room. Mine was toward the bottom of the second page. SR 8. SR8??? I scrambled for the campus map online. Nope, no building S or SR. We're new students; how is this supposed to help? Sure, maybe there will be people there to direct me that day, but I'm going after work. I don't have an extra 20 minutes to get lost.

So today I called 3 different people at the school. Yes, I'm going to be that girl. First I needed to dispute a charge on my bill (why something called 'student refund' is a charge to me, the student, is beyond all reasonable logic). Then I needed to figure out how to get into my email which hasn't worked for weeks now. After that, I discover an email from an administrative assistant regarding mail to me that had been returned to them, and that I needed to reply by today. So, I quickly called her to straighten out the mail situation and afterwards slyly asked her, 'um, do you know where the SR rooms are'? And the mystery was solved - they're in the basement. 'SR' stands for 'Seminar Room'. Crisis averted.

On Calls and Curtain Calls

It's a quarter after midnight, and I just got home.  Mr. is not yet home.  He was on call today, and it looks like it's a late night.

As you see, it was also a late night for me, but for a much more enjoyable reason: I saw Boeing Boeing on Broadway!  Ah, the rough life of being married to a guy who's never home, always having to find ways to amuse myself...

Okay, really a sorority sister wanted to take advantage of her employer's theatre discount, so a few of us headed out after work tonight to see this brilliant comedy revival.

Boeing Boeing is about a man with 3 fiancees, all flight attendants, and the hilarity that ensues when an old friend stops by for a visit.

The show was great, but it has only a little to do with the writing and much to do with the acting, timing, and staging.  This production features respected performers Bradley Whitford, Christine Baranski, Gina Gershon, Kathryn Hahn and Mary McCormack, but the man who made the show with his deadpan delivery was Mark Rylance, playing the friend.

Far more seasoned critics have reviewed this piece, so I'm not going to do so here.  I just want to give it a thumbs up, declare it a must see, and to remind anyone who might be curious to always try to see a show with its original cast.  It truly makes a difference.

Mr.'s home now, and I'm ready for bed.  Good night!  

Point for me!

Anyone who knows Mr. knows that he can be incredibly difficult to argue with. In the past (and by 'past', I mean 2 weeks ago), this used to bother me. I just wanted to watch Project Runway without him over my shoulder claiming that the producers probably design all of the outfits themselves, controlling every single aspect to insure the highest level of entertainment.
However, the steeper the climb, the greater the satisfaction when you reach the top! That's right, Mr. conceded a point to me.

Saturday night before bed, I was reading Peony in Love in dim lighting.

Mr. MW: You shouldn't read in dim lighting, it's not good for your eyes.
MW: I thought I read somewhere once that was a myth.
Mr. MW: (scoffs) No, it strains your eyes. We should get you a reading lamp.
MW: (just wanting to get back to the novel) Okay.

Now, I've been scolded about reading in the dark since I was old enough to read. It doesn't hurt my eyes, it doesn't bother me, I don't mind. So, when I read an article or saw on the news (I can't remember) that reading in the dark doesn't actually have long term effects, I was triumphantly satisfied. I may have forgotten the source, but I don't forget being right. :)
Last night I decided to find verification, so I googled, and found this link. It seemed like a decent source, and pretty much said that reading in the dark can cause eye strain, which is exhibited by a bunch of symptoms I never experience. This is mostly short term anyway but can in some cases possibly cause long term effects in nearsightedness. I am nearsighted, but I doubt it's related to eye strain as I've never experienced any of the symptoms of eye strain. It took a little bit of arguing to quasi-persuade Mr. who was rattling on about how I haven't been studied in a controlled environment or something. But finally, he questioned my source and went to find his own. A few minutes later, he conceded the point, finding verification in a legit medical journal.
Woot.

In other news, we're officially married again! Okay, so we've been officially married for over a year now, but at the beginning of this summer, Mr. lost his ring in the ocean. He decided that his original ring had been too bulky and heavy and wanted instead to have a basic small band. So, last week I dropped by the Zales by my work, found and paid for a ring, got it sized, and picked it up yesterday. Hooray, we're married! And now even strangers will know it. ;)

Black Weekend

Mr. worked every day this weekend with his on call day on Saturday, so I was left to my own devices.

On Saturday, I caught an afternoon matinee of the documentary American Teen at Sunshine Cinema on the Lower East Side with one of my sorority sisters.

First, the theatre - I've always gone to the Angelika or Quad Cinema for independent films, but Sunshine is so much better! The lobby is still quirky, giving you the full experience, but the seats are actually a) comfortable and b) above ground. Woot.

Anyway, American Teen is about a few of the high school archetypes in a small Indiana town. Having grown up in an only slightly larger Midwestern town, I was curious to see how fair the portrayal was. I suspected the stereotypes would be exaggerated, but they weren't. This was a genuine slice of life look at seniors in high school.

What I found especially interesting (and accurate to my personal experiences) was that with one exception, there was very little intermingling of the groups despite the small size of the community. While Megan, the princess, was definitely a mean girl, her victims were often within her same circle. Likewise Jake, the geek, wasn't tormented by the jocks but by a more popular band geek. It's an accurate look at the pressures your typical American teenager faces. It's definitely worth checking out if you're as fascinated by the every day as I am.

After the movie, my friend and I grabbed some coffee, then dinner. It was fun to talk about just about everything and anything. I ended up getting home around 10 that night and felt bad abandoning Mr. ... until I got back to the apartment and realized he hadn't been home yet. The only thing that sucks worse than having to work the whole weekend is having to work late on the weekend. Poor guy; welcome to medicine.

Sunday morning I finished Peony in Love, which I had started on the subway on Saturday. It's set in 17th century China and is a fictional work about actual women who had all married, and widowed, the same man.

It's well written in first person with a voice that sounds like that which you would expect from the character. Perhaps because of the setting, very different from anything I've experienced, I wasn't drawn emotionally to the story. However, I was still captivated. I simply couldn't put it down and had to know what happened next.

It kept me interested - I'd recommend it if you need something to read on a plane.

After I finished the novel, I made and ate lunch, did the dishes, went grocery shopping (which I would stop doing on Sunday afternoons if it weren't so darn convenient!), made dinner (chicken parm - shockingly easy!), did the laundry, and worked on my scrapbook.

Mr. came home and took a nap. Only 5 more days until he gets a day off.

Puppy Please

Last night in the Village the hubby and I stumbled onto a pet shop with the cutest puppies ever. Seriously. The. Cutest. Puppies. Ever. And while I'm not so pro-pet shop (I'm all about the rescue shelters instead), I am pro dog.
But anyways, this post isn't about dogs, it's about the next set of criteria when it comes to choosing a residency. The pet shop started off this whole conversation about when we'll be able to get a dog (we can't now because there's a strict no dogs police in our med school housing). Eventually, the hubby decided he's not applying anywhere that doesn't allow dogs in the (mandatory) resident housing. I emphasize that he decided this, not me. But wanting a french bulldog more than just about anything, I heartily agreed with the new criteria.
So now it's my job to figure out what that rules out. So far St. Luke's-Roosevelt looks like it's the only program impacted, but that's just because I haven't really looked into all the others, yet. At least now I know what I'll be busy doing all weekend!

Book Review: Marley & Me

For our paper anniversary, Mr. gave me a couple of books. Knowing I've breezed through quite a few novels on my commute, he chose two New York Times Bestsellers: Marley & Me and Peony in Love. I'm certain he has not read them and likely either chose them because they were under a section called 'Great as Gifts' or because he was advised to do so by a Borders salesperson. Mr. is very bright, but a literary scholar he is not. To be fair, neither am I, but I would argue that my grandmother, both my parents, and my brother are. The bar was set high.

I started with Marley & Me by John Grogan because the title was more familiar and who can resist that adorable puppy on the cover? My first impressions were lukewarm. Sure, it seemed like a nice story and the writing wasn't bad, but it didn't strike me as great literature either. When I lived with my brother, an unpublished poet and unapologetic literary snob, he would lend me works by the likes of Dave Eggers, Tom Perrotta and Michael Chabon. When I read their books, I couldn't help but feel a sort of pride and pretension knowing that I had stumbled upon the works of great talents of our generation. I didn't have that reaction to Marley & Me.

However, I've read "US Weekly" shortly after finishing Anna Karenina; I don't demand that everything I read be brilliant, just entertaining, so I continued. Suddenly I was engrossed in the story. Disobeying the unwritten rule to remain stoic on the subway, I chuckled at the crazy antics of that wild yellow lab, Marley. Without pretension, Grogan brought me in with the clean, crisp writing of a columnist, and I fell in love with his family and their beloved pet.

This morning on my commute as I finished the memoir, while I managed to prevent the many tears in my eyes from falling down my cheeks, I wasn't able to prevent myself from sniffling. Even worse than giggling, I was crying on the subway. The classic rave review - I laughed; I cried - holds true in this case.

The purpose of art, no matter the medium, is to provoke and stir emotion. Sometimes there is a bigger agenda attached, such as a political message of some sort, but what good is that message if it doesn't stir people to act? Marley & Me met this objective head on, and I now see why it reached that coveted #1 spot on the New York Times Bestseller list. I'd give it a 4 out of 5.

And the awkwardness compounds itself

A few weeks ago, I was on the train home back to the borough when I made eye contact with a familiar-looking Asian man sitting across from me.  It wasn't until I returned to my sudoku puzzle that I realized he was the benefits guy from my office.  Knowing it would be awkward to initiate a conversation on a crowded train, especially since some time had past since we made eye contact, I decided to say goodbye to him once he got off the train.  

The commute continued and suddenly we were not just in the borough, but the train was above ground.  Since there were significantly fewer people on the train, I looked up and had the following conversation:

MW: I didn't know you lived all the way out here.

HR Guy: (Stands up to hear better) I live by [Borough Medical School]

MW: (Shocked at the coincidence) My husband's a student there!

HR Guy: Yeah, I live in [my building]

MW: Me, too!  I'm on [x floor]

HR Guy: I'm on [x+2]

HR Guy:  So, do you work in the city?

MW: (Realizing he's not actually my HR Guy) Yeah, I work at a law firm

HR Guy: Oh, that's cool

We continue in silence, him still standing, for the next two stops until we both get off the train.

Since that day, I have seen the guy around campus from a distance ...and promptly avoided him.  Today I almost got on the same bus as him from the train to campus.  Instead I just kept on walking to a different bus stop for a different bus that also takes me to campus.

Maybe not the most mature response to an honest mistake, but so far it's workin' for me.

Is there a doctor in the house? Part 2

One of the nice things about being married to a medical student is that there's an almost-doctor in the house.
Another nice thing about being married to a medical student if you live in student housing is that there are almost-doctors filling the whole building.

This morning, shortly before 7:00am after Mr. had hit the snooze a few times, we heard some thuds and then a minute later a woman yelling "Can somebody help me??" while banging on our neighbor's door. Mr. and I both sprung up, and while he put on pants, I ran over to the apartment. The woman needed someone to bang down a door. The other neighbor ran to get something from his place to pry a locked door, and I cam back to my place and started fumbling around in my purse to get a card or something to card the door. I told Mr. that she needed someone to kick down the door, and he ran over. Realizing that the neighbor now had 2 male medical students assisting her, I didn't return. Mr. can card a door better than I can, and he and the other neighbor are surely both more capable of kicking in a door than I am.

The woman's husband/fiance/boyfriend had collapsed in the shower and was unresponsive. It's unclear what made him collapse in the first place, whether it was a slip and fall situation, or if he fainted.
Mr. ran downstairs to tell the security guard in our building and I assume to call 911. He then grabbed his stethoscope and went back next door. Either he or the other neighbor performed chest compressions; I could hear them counting. Mr. eventually came back to say that he was stable and the paramedics were on their way.

Meanwhile, I did everything I could for Mr. so that he wouldn't be late to work (packed his lunch, laid out his scrubs). I'm sure they'd understand, but there was certainly no need for him to have that added stress.

The paramedics came at 7:15. Why it took them so long, I have no idea. We live directly next to a huge hospital and across the street from another. There's yet another hospital 2-3 blocks away. Luckily Mr. and our other neighbor were able to help in the mean time.

I'm not sure we'll find out how this story ends as we don't know our neighbors, but my thoughts and prayers will definitely be with them.

First Anniversary

Dear Mr.,

What a ride! This past year has been filled with ups and downs, successes and disappointments.

You tackled 2nd year while we paid off my producing debut, changed careers, and then changed careers again. Now you're waking up before me to hit the wards, and soon I'll be taking classes, too, leaving us each to balance working and studying. With conflicting schedules, we probably won't get to vacation anytime soon, so instead we'll cherish the time we have, baking cookies, watching Curb Your Enthusiasm onDemand, and simply 'hanging out'.

Together we've set up our place, tackled our finances, and settled into our routines. It's not always easy for this independent girl to share things, but it's worth it to get to share my life with you.

Happy anniversary! Only 49 years until our golden anniversary... but your homepage already told you that. :)

Love,
MW

Hold That Line

Last night I went to the workshop of a new musical, Cheer Wars at my alma mater.  A friend of mine had one of the larger roles, and I was excited by what I'd heard of it.

While the music wasn't necessarily as strong as that from last week's production, it was catchy and sufficient.  The story was great, and I was literally laughing out loud at a lot of it.  I'd like a little more character development, better costumes and much stronger choreography.  But, this is why we workshop pieces!  Kudos to all involved; I really enjoyed myself.  And I've had one of the songs from the show in my head all morning... Hold that line; hold that, hold that line...

I had hoped Mr. might join me, but he had to work.  In fact, because he got to drain a patient's peritoneal fluid (or something like that), he didn't get home until 8:30.

No worries, though - that's what gay boyfriends are for!  My gay boyfriend from home moved to the city earlier this year, so he came with me to the musical.  I'm pretty sure he enjoyed it much more than Mr. would have, anyway. 

Is there a doctor in the house?

One of the nice things about being married to a med student is that there's an almost-doctor in the house.

One of the bad things about being married to a med student is that he's almost never in the house.

Today in an act of utter clumsiness involving a ceramic soap dish, I managed to get a small but gnarly gash on my back.  There were little ceramic pieces around the broken soapdish which made me concerned that there might be some around the wound as well.  Since Mr. was at the hospital, I awkwardly called STM to come take a look.  She successfully identified a tiny ceramic crumb and went back home.

Okay, so not exactly like borrowing a cup of sugar, but it's good to know your neighbors... especially when those neighbors are fellow student spouses who are familiar with the hours involved in being a med student.  Thanks again, S!

Speaking of Dreaming...

Last night I dreamt that Mr. had too much studying to do and couldn't make it out to our anniversary dinner. However, he encouraged me to still go out to dinner by myself, which I did.

wtf does that mean?

I'm Dreaming of a White...Dinner...

So, while I cook something almost every night, I try to cook something that is neither pasta, rice, nor frozen pizza at least once each week. Actually, I lied, as often my 'special' dish will be a combination of ground beef and pasta.
...Moving on...
So last night I started out planning a meal that I hoped to be feasible in a tiny New York kitchen after my long day of work followed by my long commute that was also well-balanced.

I ended up with this:

Yes kids, that's chicken (white) for protein, mashed potatoes (white) for starch, and zucchini (white with green skin) for the vegetable. Who says meals should be colorful anyway?

Monochromatic color scheme aside, I think I did a decent job on a budget, no less!

The meal, which fed us both for dinner and me for lunch (yum) cost $8 + seasoning (small amounts of butter, milk, lemon pepper, flour, salt & pepper).

What you need:
1 lb Chicken
2 lbs Potatoes (more if you really like potatoes like me)
1 Zucchini
1/4 c. Flour
1 Tbsp Lemon Pepper
1/3 c. Milk
Butter
Salt/Pepper

How to prepare (in very simplistic terms):

• Boil water in a medium or large pot
• Peal potatoes and chop into 1/2" cubes (or whatever size you prefer)
• Place potatoes in boiling water, set timer for 20 minutes
• Mix flour and lemon pepper in bowl.
• Coat chicken in lemon pepper mixture. (Note: there will be mixture left over, so if you want to save to use again, use a spoon to drizzle the mixture over the chicken)
• Place a small amount of butter in a large skillet over low heat (the thicker the pieces of chicken, the lower the heat).
• Place chicken in skillet.
• While chicken is cooking, chop the zucchini into slices and place on microwave-safe dish.
• Use your discretion in determining when to turn the chicken over. For thin slices, it may only need 2 minutes on each side; thicker slices may need 5+ minutes per side.
• After the timer rings, buzzes, whatever, drain the potatoes
• Add milk, butter and salt to potatoes and mash. Using a significant amount of butter makes them extra yummy...but it also makes them extra fatty. Season as desired.
• Place zucchini in the microwave for roughly 40 seconds, butter lightly and season with salt & pepper.

And, serve. See? Super easy. And cheap. Yet, real food.

Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde?

A few months ago, Mr. spearheaded this project doing something for a surgeon with a couple of his classmates. I don't know much about the project except that it meant even more time spent in the anatomy lab and that Mr. was the lead med student on it.
Well, somehow between helping first years with anatomy, sitting on the board for the student-run free clinic, finishing 2nd year, studying for the boards, and dealing with a long commute and even longer hours, he dropped the ball and hadn't yet gotten around to contacting the surgeon about writing up an abstract. It had been on his mental to-do list for some time, but sometimes people just beat you to the punch.
Luckily, the guy who beat him to the punch this time was a nice guy who gave him a heads up before doing so. Via text message, Mr. originally said it was fine that the other guy write the abstract. But the thing is, it wasn't fine. This was his project. He and I talked it out, and I advised him to just be honest with his classmate about how he was really hoping to be first author, etc. From what I could tell only hearing one half of the conversation, I think his classmate was understanding. Crisis averted.

Mr. spent the rest of the night editing another abstract written by a PhD whose first language is not English. I'm pretty good with grammar (not always apparent on here), so I tried my hand at it. Unfortunately, I don't spend my days reading science experiments, so I wasn't sure if I should be fixing all of those sentences written in passive voice or if I should just leave them. I think I'll stick to proofing legal documents.

Mr. (Dr. Jekyll) didn't mind, though, and took back over the editing.


This morning, Mr. (aka Mr. Hyde) and I got into a playful argument that started about McCain's VP Choice, then moved on to Bloomberg and peoples' desire for him to be president, to McCain's senility, and then I looked at my watch to see where I should be in my morning routine. It was 7:25, and since Mr. typically leaves at 7:15, I said 'don't you have to leave?' To which he replied 'yes' and went on his way.

5 minutes later I get a text message from Mr.:
"don't you have to leave?". Glad to know I'm wanted in the house.

Sarcasm or anger? Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde? I suspect it was the latter, but as my first instinct was sarcasm, I went with it:
lol. I love you, baby. Just didn't want you to be late as it seems you normally leave around 7:15/7:20.

Above comic by Michelle Au. Ever since STM linked the underwear drawer to our site, I've been reading the archives from 2004 to now. I think Mr. is either a Gunner, a One-Track Mind, or Painfully Enthusiastic. This morning I picture him as a gunner. Thus, the unnecessary frustration.